Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Hero Kitteh uv Crazy Woman Creek + Wat I Founded in Omaha

Mai primates just got back frum a trip to Montana. On the way, they stopped at a rest stop and dere wuz a kitteh there trying to gets their attenshun. It wuz one of the rest stops where there iz places to grill meatses somewhere neer Crazy Woman Creek in Wyoming.

They thought the kitteh wuz just trying to see if they had hotdogs. He wuz akting like a feral kitteh but staring them in the eyes and kept backing away, but he looked well-fed so iz prolly a good place to hang fur a rest stop kitteh, getting meatses insted uv licking out bags uv Doritos in the trash cans, you know.

Anyhao, he took off wen he realized no hotdogz wuz in the offing, and wen they turned around they wuz far enuf away frum the van and it wuz getting light enuf to see it wuz leeking. Wuz about 5AM on Saturday morning, so noplace who did transmissions wuz open. They started buying transmission fluid at gas stashuns an putting it in efurry 30 miles until they got to Billings, and the van finally completely died in a parking lot there.

So thanks yoo, Rest Stop Kitteh! If you didn't show mai primates there wuz a leek, they woulda broken down a hundred miles frum their destinashun with no one to fix it until Monday and Dad-primate wud gets in truble at hiz noo job.

One place quoted $1500 but sed it wud take a week, but they needed to get bak to Sioux Falls bai Monday so they sed "no". Wen his manager came in latur and found out he sed he cudn't fix it in a day, the manager called back and offered to fix it fur $2500. Jurk.

Primates decided to abandon the van outta spite. They said manager sounded surprised and sad, but $2500 fur a van that's reddy to graduate High School with no guarantee they wouldn't add moar fees and no recourse if they did a bad job, and then having to drive 12 hourz on faith? Yeah, rite.

We onlee buy uzed carz with cash and we wuz gonna get a noo one soon anyway so $2500 iz about a third uv a car fur us.

We haz relatives in Billings, and primate's niece iz having a bebbeh and they know someone who has the parts and can fix it fur $800, so we gives it to hur. Has noo windshield, shocks, struts, tires and stuff cuz primates put monies in efurry year to keep uzed cars upgraded, just needs noo transmission, and iz very safe fur bebbehs. Also haz lots uv room fur mommy thingz.

But this reminded me I has an old video uv mai trip to Omaha. There is a gigantic zoo there. Haz a rainforest exhibit and an Imax and stuff, but this is mai fafurite exhibit:

Monday, June 29, 2009

Video: How to Make a Cat Shirt

This iz a repeat fur sum uv you. I recentlee gots mai noo buziness cards and on the bak it sez, "You can make your own cat shirt! Free pattern and video tutorial at www.orangecatblues.com."

Iz all tru, uv course, but iz kinda hard to finds this stuff cuz I is still trying to finish a noo look fur mai blog and efurrything iz all ovur the place. Nao I has a Loki Map, finally! Iz like a site map but I iz all over the internet so iz a map uv links if I iz napping at a different site and you iz looking fur me.

I makes a noo version uv the shirt tutorial video awhile ago but nevur put it up. Nao I has. Iz at the Internet Archive Orange Cat Blues Collection soon, just like efurrything else, but fur live action videos I uze Catster Video.

Here is the Cat Shirt Pattern (pdf) and mai tutorial.

Lookee wat I finds bai the catnips!

I goes outside to check catnip crop, and this iz wat I finds:

Also, Farm Queen Droopy-Mayday looks like she lost LOTS uv weight!

Votes iz in on the Caturday Poll. Fafurrite things about summer:

Air condishuning and sun puddlez tied fur first place, firefliez wuz next, and lastly, fresh catnips. I puts up noo poll soon. Iz still a Caturday Poll but I no has computer until today so will only be 5 days to vote!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Strolling on teh Beach-- A Storee Abouts Mai Shurt

Primate iz reelee going J. Peterman on the Etsy stuffs. Funemployment maybe making hur crazee. Iz too silly?

You're strolling barepawed along the beach, sidestepping crabs and enjoying the sleepy feeling of the mid-morning sun. You swat at a rising butterfly and as you look up, you see... her.

She is curled on a soft, terrycloth towel in the shade under a tree of nervous birdies, her tail rounds her paws, demurely bringing attention to her perky whiskers.

Your eyes meet.

Luckily for you, you're wearing your orange and yellow Hawaiian print cat shirt. Purrfect for travel to a faraway beach or that sunny spot by the window, it features button details, snap back closure, H-harness opening, inset sleeves and a fold-down collar. Most importantly, your good taste distinguishes you from the millions of other cats of your breed, just like the cat-of-the-world you are.

Her ears give you the come-hither twitch, and you notice there is room on that towel for two.

Teh orange Hawaiian Print Cat Shirt iz available at Etsy.

Dis mai usual orange shirt pikture, but aftur reeding Daisy's post abouts photo editing magic, I remembered we used to play moar wif teh backgrounds, so I added a pikture frum primate's trip to Caribbean to see mai cousin Chewie. He a Pomeranian. It lookses bettur nao!

Almost looks like I travels, but I don't need to get in teh car!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

I Fading Away (Abouts Zone Cooling, Reelee)

I tries to convince primate to puts in air conditioning last month, but she argues "Izn't summer yet!" Well nao iz summer and we haz no air conditioning still and yesterday it got to 85 degrees in the house.

I know, wuz Fahrenheit, but feels like Centigrade, srsly! Peoples thing uv bitter cold windz wen they think uv South Dakota, but we has near sauna temperaturez in summer and high humidity. Lotta tourists has to stop at Walmart fur cheap summer clothes cuz they no expects it.

Anyhoo, primates uze "Zone Heating" and "Zone cooling" instead uv all ovur the house.

♥ Tip from the human: Zone heating and cooling means using different heating and cooling settings in different areas of your house, depending on use. We use an electric heater to supplement the living area in the harsh South Dakota Winters and switched to window air conditioners in the bedroom, livingroom and work/craft room. Using them only when needed saves money and a little of the environment.

Oddly enough, those cheap, tacky 5000 BTU electric fireplace heaters by Dimplex work better in our rooms with ceiling fans than the Vornado we bought based on a Consumer Reports suggestion, though the Vornado works great in the craft room.

Also saves a little sanitee!

So anyways, I convince hur yesterday bai spending all day (wen I wuzn't on teh internets) on the floor under the ceiling fan, playing ded. As you can see above. It wurked. She gots out air condishuners and I has Sanctuary at last!

Wuz getting wurried I wud has to take off mai fur coat until Oktober.

Monday, June 22, 2009

The Verminator, a Tragic Tail uv Destinee

Hooman doesn't like sales pitches. Iz not hur style, and iz not very fun. But you know wat iz fun? Storees! We likes telling storees on video but we still has no noo video card. We gets one eventually, just not rite nao. So, here iz a storee fur you. (You can enjoy the storee wifout buying the Verminator, I thinks. I puts it in blue block so you know primate correkted mai speling.)

∞ The Verminator ∞

In 1984, a waitress in Los Angeles discovered a laser pointer on the floor while setting up a mouse trap after a corporate lunch meeting. Up until that time, laser pointers were used exclusively to torment captive audiences in business meetings.

Taking it home, the young woman soon discovered laser pointers were also useful for tormenting cats, and the red dot went the way of the marble and the weasel ball.

In 2029, O-Hai-net, a computer network entirely run by LOLcats, took over the internet and barred all humans from electronic interaction until they could gain access to their opposable thumbs. With the help of a small, enthusiastic team of sympathetic human engineers aggravated with the switch from slides and laser pointers to Powerpoint presentations entirely made of text, O-Hai-net sent a cyborg kitty back to 1984 to stop the woman who originally repurposed the laser pointer as a cat toy.

Armed only with a laser pointer of his own, the Verminator appeared in the middle of a business meeting, spotted a nommy mouse making off with a cheese puff, and gave chase.

He nommed the mouse, and the cheese puff, but he dropped his laser pointer under a table.

You can finds the Verminator at Etsy.

Don't furget there iz a Caturday Poll to the right abouts wat you likes about summer!

Saturday, June 20, 2009


I wuz just trying to figure out hao to puts a Google Calendar on mai blog. I has listed at Etsy which Animinis are being listed next on wat days, but I gets an idea fur putting in a calendar on mai blog.

I looks it up in the widget thingy but there iz SO many. All I really wanted wuz offishul Google calendar, you know? So anyway, I founds the "embed" code finally in the regular google calendar settingz.

But befoar I dids that I found this widget called "Fish". Well, I luvs fishies, so I has to try it. I installed an aquarium at the bottom uv mai blog. It looks like dis:

Iz fun to looks at, and you can feeds the fishies bai clicking. Wen there is no foods, they follow the mouse. Is prolly the onlee time you sees fishies following mouses.

(I tries to feed the red one furst but he not very smart. I feels sorry fur him.)

But they is not nommy. They tastes like pixels.

Organizing UR Play Space: Caturday On Hoomans

Lots uv hoomans buy noo supplies without knowing where they iz going to put them. I know, iz crazee, but iz true....

Nao that she iz on Funemployment, mai primate has started up hur Esty Shop again! It tooks awhiles to get hur supplies in order. This palette uv clay all measured out fur animinis took 10 hours total!

Whether you iz playing oar cooking oar doing artwork, it iz most important to makes sure you can find efurry thing you need. Like me, I knows where mai food and litturbox and bestest nap spots iz, but also I stores mai furry mouse toys under the TV stand and mai treat ball behind the refridgerator so mai primate gets practice fishing wif a backscratcher.

Furst thing iz, hoomanz has to has a room, oar part uv one, set aside just fur art and craft things. Otherwise, you is gonna leave them all over the house willy-nilly. It wud be like storing sum marbles behind the toilet and others at the bottom ov the stairs and moar in the lint trap. You think having marbles handy in efurry room meens you can always find them, but it doesn't. You wud lose all your marbles that way.

♥ Tip from the Human: Set aside a specific area for storing supplies. If you wouldn't store half your pots and pans in the bathroom, why should your art supplies be all over the house?

Mai primate took over a junk room. She will be embarrassed to show you this but I no carez. You needs to see it. Uzed to look something like this.

She divided efurrything up bai wat kind uv project, like sewing, jewelry, painting and stuffs. Then she gots sum plastic shelves and clear totes that fits them. Clear totes are essential because you can sees in them wifout opening them. Nao it looks like this:

♥ Tip from the Human: Whenever possible, choose clear storage so you can see contents.

Two uv the biggest problemz uv crafty hoomans is

  1. Finding supplies for the current projekt.
  2. Finishing oar discarding old projekts.

She has a shelf uv empty containers labeled "Current Project". This iz so she can put together supplies fur a single project. Sumtimes you need paint wif your clay stuff oar beads foar a sewing project. Having a tote available to put efurrything in to bring to your work area helps enshure you don't needs to waste time searching fur multimedia supplies when you iz on a roll.

♥ Tip from the Human: Fill up a tote, painter's box or sewing kit with supplies needed for one project, then make sure it is empty again when you are finished.

One tote iz set aside fur unfinished projekts. Hoomans often start things and nevur finish them. Iz their way. Sumtimes they thinks a projekt will be funner, oar easier, oar they run out uv supplies, oar they mess up and think they can fix it latur. It happens to efurryone.

So unfinished projekts, fur whatevar reason, go in the unfinished projects tote. Befoar starting a noo project, either finish oar discard an old one. You may find you feel bettur when you gives youself permission to give up!

♥ Tip from the Human: If you've had a project in your unfinished project tote for over a month, admit you have no intention of finishing it. Give it to someone else, recycle it, or discard it.

This iz the bestest way she found to organize hur play supplies, even if they is in containers that makes it impossible to get furs in.

Monday, June 15, 2009

The Father's Day Song (Animated)

I posts this a little earlee cuz I luvs mai Dad. :)

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Wednesday WOW: Funemployment

Mai primate just finally gots lade off. This meanz she gets to stay home wif me ALL SUMMER! Whoo!

Wat she iz doing iz called "Funemployment". She's not hanging out and eating and crashing at other hoomanz houses to mooch on their foodz. She akshully haz planz and a skedule.

Wat she noticed already iz hur todo list iz full. A lot uv other hoomanz seemz to think cuz she haz no official job nao she iz looking fur thingz to do so they ask hur to do thingz. She'z having trouble convincing them she doesn't have time fur theze things.

A chance to wurk on projekts she's wanted to finish fur a long time unencumbered bai the demandz uv a boss besides hurself iz an opportunity that comes along once oar twice in a lifetime fur some hoomanz. She haz to finish these projects while she haz the time to wurk on them! And they iz BIG projects she iz planning fur a looooong time cuz she knew she waz getting lade off eventually. A few months between jobz iz sumtimez the onlee time a purson haz to pursue a life's wurk as if they has a chance to do it fur a living.

So, wen someone haz had time to save up monies to turn unemployment into funemployment, pleeze takes them seriously wen they sez they haz no time cuz they haz wurk to do. It cud be they iz just the kind uv purrson who looks forward to turning lemonz into lemonade and selling it on a streetcorner stand fur fun!

But anyhoo, I haz a slightly diffrent philosophy than mai primate wen it comez to todo lists. Mai todo list goez like this:


Thus ends Loki's Wurds Of Wizdom fur dis week.